Yesterday I got to shoot in slippahs. By the water. And most importantly for a person that trusts me to do what I do. It was last minute and unexpected but I think something happened inside of me that changed things from here on out. Funny thing is that I’d been sitting around for some huge, monumental event to make me feel motivated. free. passionate. and legit for a long time. Now I realize that all of that “waiting” and “stepping back” was only putting me down and rewinding me to square five hundred and seventy six. Not that this is a game or anything but fake statistics are always fun yes?
Anyway, after photographing Adriana and Ethan’s rehearsal dinner at Ocean Garden in Paradise Cove, I drove home in silence. No music, no loud thoughts and certainly no rushing. Just the sound of the road and a huge smile spread across my heart. And if I wasn’t paranoid about giant bugs flying into my car at night I would have rolled the windows down so my hair could dance but whoa, let’s take it one step at a time. From west side to semi central Town side I thought about hours earlier, when I changed INTO my flip flops to begin shooting. You guys, this is a big deal. Normally I change OUT of my slippahs to start work. I thought about how different the day before yesterday had felt. It was one of those dang, i’m totally gonna wake up with poofy eyes tomorrow moments. I even described myself as “a lioness stuck in a cage at the zoo” in between tears as I tried to express my feelings to Eddie. Seriously??? A lioness??? New low point people.
I haven’t blogged or let alone written in my journal for a very long time. There’s no real reason for this, I just haven’t and I regret it. So I wanted to write this quick (not really, it’s taken me over an hour!) post to remind myself of yesterday and the things I decided between myself, my heart and my business. And for anyone that reads this blog I wanted to say hello. I have so much to share on this little corner of the web and I can’t wait for you to see it. Thank you for being patient with me, I miss y’all.
This here post is a promise to myself. That THIS TIME I’m really going to make things happen. Not like allofthoseothertimesinthepast I’ve written about how “motivated” and “fired up” I felt…if you’ve read my blog for any amount of time you’d know that I’ve gotten all gung-ho about my business many times. It’s embarrassing. But this time???? THIS TIME IS FOR SERIOUS. I promise.
The lioness is out.